Richard Carlson

As we learn in the Zen philosophy, when you learn to “let go” of problems instead of resisting with all your might, your life will begin to flow.
– Richard Carlson

If we would just slow down, happiness would catch up to us.
– Richard Carlson

One of the mistakes many of us make is that we feel sorry for ourselves, or for others, thinking that life should be fair, or that someday it will be. It’s not and it won’t.
– Richard Carlson

Circumstances don’t make a person, they reveal him or her.
– Richard Carlson

Each time you notice yourself falling into the “I wish life were different” trap, back off and start over. Take a breath and remember all that you have to be grateful for.
– Richard Carlson

The sooner we accept the inevitable dilemma of not being able to win the approval of everyone we meet, the easier our lives will become.
– Richard Carlson

People who live the most fulfilling lives are the ones who are always rejoicing at what they have.
– Richard Carlson

The ego is that part of us that wants to be seen, heard, respected, considered special, often at the expense of someone else. It’s the part of us that interrupts someone else’s story, or impatiently waits his turn to speak so that he can bring the conversation and attention back
to himself.
– Richard Carlson

The more patient you are, the more accepting you will be of what is, rather than insisting that life be exactly as you would like it to be. Without patience, life is extremely frustrating.
– Richard Carlson

Let go of the idea that gentle, relaxed people can’t be superachievers.
– Richard Carlson

Do something nice for someone else – and don’t tell anyone about it… you always feel good when you give to others. Rather than diluting the positive feelings by telling others about your own kindness, by keeping it to yourself you get to retain all the positive feelings.
– Richard Carlson

If someone throws you the ball, you don’t have to catch it.
– Richard Carlson

Look for the extraordinary in the ordinary… we see in life what we want to see. If you search for ugliness you’ll find plenty of it. If you want to find fault with other people, your career, or the world in general, you’ll certainly be able to do so. But the opposite is also true. If you look
for the extraordinary in the ordinary, you can train yourself to see it.
– Richard Carlson

Relax… most of us postpone relaxation until our “in basket” is empty. Of course it never is.
– Richard Carlson

Stress is nothing more than a socially acceptable form of mental illness.
– Richard Carlson

When we are immobilized by little things – when we are irritated, annoyed, and easily bothered – our (over-) reactions not only make us frustrated but actually get in the way of getting what we want.
– Richard Carlson

One of the cardinal rules of joyful living is that judging others takes a great deal of energy and, without exception, pulls you away from where you want to be.
– Richard Carlson

Reading is a gift. It’s something you can do almost anytime and anywhere. It can be a tremendous way to learn, relax, and even escape.
– Richard Carlson

The mind-set that says “I’ll be happy when this desire is fulfilled” is the same mind-set that will repeat itself once that desire is met.
– Richard Carlson

One of the most important questions you can ever ask yourself is, “Do I want to be ‘right’ – or do I want to be happy?”
– Richard Carlson

Needing to be right – or needing someone else to be wrong – encourages others to become defensive, and puts pressure on us to keep defending.
– Richard Carlson

We take our own goals so seriously that we forget to have fun along the way, and we forget to cut ourselves some slack. We take simple preferences and turn them into conditions for our own happiness… It’s helpful to keep reminding yourself and repeating the sentence, “Life
isn’t an emergency.”
– Richard Carlson

I try to remember to start my day thinking of someone to thank. To me, gratitude and inner peace go hand in hand.
– Richard Carlson

Whenever we hold on to our anger, we turn “small stuff” into really “big stuff” in our minds. We start to believe that our positions are more important than our happiness. They are not.
– Richard Carlson

Your job is to try to determine what the people in your life are trying to teach you. You’ll find that if you do this, you’ll be far less annoyed, bothered, and frustrated by the actions and imperfections of other people.
– Richard Carlson

Reflection is one of the most underused yet powerful tools for success.
– Richard Carlson

When you take time, often, to reflect on the miracle of life – the miracle that you are even able to read this book – the gift of sight, of love, and all the rest, it can help to remind you that many of the things that you think of as “big stuff” are really just “s mall stuff” that you are turning into big stuff.
– Richard Carlson

You are what you practice most.
– Richard Carlson

When our attention is in the present moment, we push fear from our minds. Fear is the concern over events that might happen in the future – we won’t have enough money, our children will get into trouble, we will get old and die, whatever. To combat fear, the best strategy is to learn to bring your attention back to the present.
– Richard Carlson

When you let someone else win an argument, often you both end up winners.- Richard Carlson

The key to a good life is this: If you’re not going to talk about something during the last hour of your life, then don’t make it a top priority during your lifetime.
– Richard Carlson

Ask yourself the question, “Will this matter a year from now?”
– Richard Carlson

One of the most dynamic and significant changes you can make in your life is to make the commitment to drop all negative references to your past, to begin living now.
– Richard Carlson

Patience is one of those special qualities where success feeds on itself. Once you reach little milestones – five minutes of successful patience – you’ll begin to see that you do, indeed, have the capacity to be patient, even for longer periods of time. Over time, you may even become a patient person.
– Richard Carlson

Children listen best with their eyes. What you do is what they hear.
– Richard Carlson

Healing from a loss is a natural process of life – just as healing from a broken bone is too. Knowing this in the midst of pain is of great comfort.
– Richard Carlson

To a large degree, the measure of our peace of mind is determined by how much we are able to live in the present moment.
– Richard Carlson

The next time you find yourself in an argument, rather than defend your position, see if you can see the other point of view first… Contrary to popular belief, this attitude does not make you weak.
– Richard Carlson

Unhappiness doesn’t and can’t exist on its own. Unhappiness is the feeling that accompanies negative thinking about your life. In the absence of that thinking, the unhappiness, or stress, or jealousy, can’t exist. There is nothing to hold your negative feelings in place other
than your own thinking.
– Richard Carlson

Turn your melodrama into a mellow-drama.
– Richard Carlson

So many people spend so much of their life energy “sweating the small stuff” that they completely lose touch with the magic and beauty of life.
– Richard Carlson

If you regularly take a minute to check in with yourself, to ask yourself, “What’s really important?” you may find that some of the choices you are making are in conflict with your own stated goals. This strategy can help you align your actions with your goals and encourage you to make more conscious, loving decisions.
– Richard Carlson

Life is a great deal more fun and much easier to manage when you stop blaming others. Give it a try and see what happens.
– Richard Carlson

When you learn the habit of responding to life with more ease, problems that seemed “insurmountable” will begin to seem more manageable. And even the “biggies,” things that are truly stressful, won’t throw you off track as much as they once did.
– Richard Carlson

I’ve found that simply reminding myself that life doesn’t have to be a soap opera is a powerful method of calming down.
– Richard Carlson

The trick is to be grateful when your mood is high and graceful when it is low.
– Richard Carlson

Breathe before you speak… I spent most of my life waiting for my turn to speak. If you’re at all like me, you’ll be pleasantly amazed at the softer reactions and looks of surprise as you let others completely finish their thought before you begin yours. Often, you will be allowing
someone to feel listened to for the very first time.
– Richard Carlson

Our minds are powerful instruments. When we decide that something is true or beyond our reach, it’s very difficult to pierce through this self-created hurdle.
– Richard Carlson

Practice random acts of kindness… There are five toll bridges in the San Francisco Bay Area. A while back, some people began paying the tolls of the cars immediately behind them. The drivers would drive to the toll window, and pull out their dollar bill, only to be informed, “Your
toll has been paid by the car ahead of you.” This is an example of a spontaneous, random gift, something given without expectation of or demand for anything in return. You can imagine the impact that tiny gift had on the driver of the car! Perhaps it encouraged him to be a nicer person that day. Often a single act of kindness sets a series of kind acts in motion.
– Richard Carlson

One of my favorite sayings comes from Seng-Ts’an. He said, “Our way is not difficult, save the picking and choosing.” Entire books and weeklong courses could be developed around these words. The wisdom is simple, but extremely powerful and profound, particularly when dealing with loss.
– Richard Carlson

Don’t sweat the small stuff… and it’s all small stuff.
– Richard Carlson

The old adage, “If it sounds too good to be true, it probably is” isn’t always correct. In fact, the suspicion, cynicism, and doubt that are inherent in this belief can and does keep people from taking advantage of excellent opportunities.
– Richard Carlson

Choose to be kind over being right and you’ll be right everytime.
– Richard Carlson